ROB MANFRED MANN’S LEAGUE OF THE BLIND

After a dramatic week of snarky e-mails and indecision, the teams have been chosen!  It turns out Mike DeMay is the worst millennial ever, doesn’t check his e-mail unless he’s at work, otherwise this could have been a 24 hour process.  They delays could have been strategic, had Cheech waited a little longer, perhaps he wouldn’t have taken the Red Sox 2nd overall.  I’m sure David Price’s diagnosis of “rest” won’t lead to further setbacks and ultimately a surgery.  Especially if their medical staff is anything like the one we have in St. Louis.    

Extended spring training continues along with the World Baseball Classic set to start later this week.  USA, Japan, and the D.R. are co-favorites at +300.  While TOB enjoys the USA very much, not sure this is the year that we are Great Again in baseball.  The D.R. are fun to watch, Japan always seems to sneak in there (similar to the LLWS).  Keep an eye out for the next Yu Darvish…Dice-K.

And now, a word from our sponsor:

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Final draft choices, by player and team

1. Mike - Silky Johnson's Player Haters:  Cubs, Yankees, Tigers, Angels, Braves, Padres
2. Cheech - Dexter's Laboratory:  Red Sox, Rangers, Cardinals, Royals, D-Backs, Reds
3. Tony - Synderhard-on for Kershaw:  Dodgers, Mets, Blue Jays, Pirates, Rays, White Sox
4. Dragon - Blake Street Bombers:  Nationals, Giants, Rockies, Orioles, Brewers, Twins
5. Steve - Cano Corn:  Astros, Indians, Mariners, Marlins, Phillies, Athletics

Here to defend their clownish picks, are the participants:

Silky Johnson’s Player Haters

• Cubs- I feel like I need to biohazard level body scrub down for taking the Cubs. I hate them down to my bones. HOWEVER, I’m in it to win it and if you’re not first, you’re last.
• Yankees- They did an absolute fleece job on teams during the trade deadline last year and almost made the playoffs. They resigned Chapman and have a TON of young talent. I see them being close to the top of the AL East.
• Tigers- Not super thrilled about this pick, but the pitching should be strong.
• Angels- Mike Trout… that’s all.
• Braves- Could be sneaky good this year. New stadium and a lot of turnover on the roster. I think they’ll finish 3rd in the East.
• Padres- I had the last pick. Fuck off.

Dexter’s Laboratory

• Red Sox - I was torn between selecting the Red Sox or the Dodgers, but I feel really good about my choice now knowing that David Price is likely getting Tommy John surgery. 
• Cards - They may not win the division, but they're good for a solid 90 wins, plus I didn't want to get yelled at by my wife every time the Cards were on TV for rooting against them if they played one of my other teams. 
• Royals - Happy to get my favorite team on my roster. The Indians are going to experience an ALCS hangover, and Detroit are a bunch of has-beens, the Royals are going to be in the running to win the division. 
• D-Backs - Who wouldn't want a team who goes by "D-Backs"? Is Randy Johnson still pitching for them? I know nothing about this franchise. 
• Reds - I don't like the Reds. I wanted to choose a team that I would enjoy rooting for, like the Padres, but they suck and this is a competition and I'm here to win not to lose.

Synderhard-on for Kershaw

• Dodgers – Kershaw healthy for the season, solid line-up, 90+ wins last year, need I say more?  No?  Well, I will anyway because I don’t have a word limit (shout out to Squarespace).  Dave Roberts is only going to improve as a manager (take notes Mike Matheny), Magic Johnson is now involved with the Lakers so he’ll leave the Dodgers alone, and they have a shit load of money so no free agent is out of the question!  The Giants are a threat every year, but they should be able to get some cheap wins against the Padres, Rockies, and D-Backs.  Sidenote, Clayton Kershaw looks just like my cousin David.  Both have floppy hair, love ping pong, live in California, and I’ve never seen them in a room together.  If it comes out that Clayton Kershaw wears toe socks, I’ll be convinced.  LA beat writer, get on that!
• Mets – Thor!  Cespedas!  A healthy pitching staff (fingers crossed)!  Also, similar to the Dodgers, a pretty bad division after the Nats.  Phillies, Braves, and Marlins should produce about 45 wins.  Nats are choke artists so hopefully the Mets play them a ton in September.

Also, there is this:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=io4c2y-veLs

• Blue Jays – Losing Encarnacion is going to hurt, but Joey Bats is back, along with Donaldson and Tulo.  Pitching staff led the AL in ERA last year, we the North!
• Pirates – Due for a bounce back after a round 2016, first time they’ve missed the playoffs in a several years.  Or maybe not, I’m a Cardinals fan so I really don’t mind seeing them struggle.  McCutcheon moved to right, probably for the best, may even get shipped out if this season starts to fall apart by June.  So long as he goes to one of my other teams, that’s alright by me!
• Rays – I know very little about the Rays anymore since they lose all of their players every couple of years (except Longoria, keep fighting the good fight buddy).  Surprisingly, Maddon left and they have continued to win (well, to some degree).  If they can go .500 this was a solid pick in the 5th round.
• White Sox – Chris Sale is gone, addition by subtraction.  That guy has a bad attitude and hates wearing a retro jersey.  Big young talent.  It’s obviously a stretch, but hey, I only need about 75 wins from these guys.

Blake Street Bombers

• No coment, I prefer hockey.

Cano Corn

• Trust me I've been involved in a lot of picks over the years and these picks of mine are really quite fantastic. Quality organizations from top to bottom. You have the Astros and the Indians, both are going to be division winners, both probably the two best teams in the league let alone in their division, followed by the best team in the Amercian League West in the Mariners. I probably would have won this with just these teams. And I don't need to spend too much time listing the accomplishments of the Marlins, who have never lost a playoff series, just superb. We have all seen Moneyball and know how the Athletics win all the time. This is a phenomenal group of winners. I couldn't be happier with how this turned out. 

Coming next week, it’s nearly March Madness time.  TOB is on record as being a compulsive (and terrible!) gambler.  Stay tuned! 

-TonyonBall