It’s time to get set the Final Four (I mean, College Football Championship) and the other Bowl Games. Initially, Tonyonball was concerned that he would run out of things to be annoyed by. Wrong! They keep making bad commercials, and pears are still walking around in society. The following must be stopped, or at least curbed:
-Stores telling you they will treat you like family if you shop there. We all have an uncle or cousin who is some sort of tradesman (or just thinks they are handy). Do you really want them to come hang a ceiling fan for you? First of all, you’ll be supplying all materials, food for a day, Busch beer, and 28 hours of your time. Then, when it half works you can’t say anything because hey, he did it for FREE…right. I want companies to treat me like a customer, but a good customer that they expect repeat business from. I do not need my car dealership or jeweler to treat me like a drunk uncle.
-While we’re on annoying commercials, how about squeaky voiced radio commercials. “The Homeloan Expert!” “It’s time for a diamond for your special lady, we call our collection Toyland.” “I’m Ray Vinson with Vinson Mortgage.” I get it, you have a distinct voice and think that will grab our attention. Mission accomplished, we are all aware of you, and Tonyonball will never shop at your stores. Interestingly, most of these commercials involve mortgages and diamonds, essentially commodities. And since when did mortgage companies get to call credit card companies greedy? Did we recently have a credit card bubble that nearly destroyed our economy, or was that lax mortgage laws preying on people buying houses they couldn’t afford on adjustable rate mortgages by not being completely honest on what could happen when the rate jumps in 5-7 years? Oh wait, that would be the “Homeloan Expert.” Please take your squeaky voices and pandering somewhere else.
-This is an older complaint, because I’m not sure if it still goes on. A few years back, Walgreens put out a huge ad campaign that they were going to stop selling alcohol and cigarettes because they care so much about their customers’ health. Well that’s nice. Is Walgreens going to continue selling sugary drinks such as soda, koolaid, face juice, etc. all marketed at children? Will they continue to sell candy, other high fat snacks, and cereal such as Chocolate Coated Sugar Bombs? If that’s the case, Tonyonball is not so sure that Walgreens cares about our health. Diabetes is on the rise, especially adult on set, and heart disease causes around 25% of all deaths in America. Lung Cancer, while tragic, causes about 14% of deaths. Perhaps if Walgreens really cares out our health and not just a marketing campaign, they should cut back on other things than just cigarettes and alcohol.
Now onto Championship Week Picks!
Cheech through Week 12 (10-15-1 – Not. Good.). Week 13 picks:
Colorado +8 over Washington: Because this would totally mess up everything for the college playoff rankings. Bring on the chaos!
Navy -3 over Temple: Let's see here, how can I justify this totally random pick? Well, Navy beat Notre Dame, and Temple lost to Army, who got trucked by Notre Dame. And since Notre Dame is a totally consistent, reliable team that would make a great measuring stick to judge two teams that I haven't seen play all year, I'll go with that.
OK State +11.5 over OU: It is a road game for the 'pokes, but 11 and a half points seems like an awful lot for a rivalry game between the #9 and #10 teams in the country. Plus, Mike Gundy is almost 50 now. He's a man! Can you blieve it?
Bama -24 over Florida: Wow, that's a big spread, especially for a conference championship game. But Bama is too good and Florida just lost by 18 to Florida State. I think I would actually like this pick better if Bama had a loss on their resume and wasn't already assured of a playoff spot.
Clemson -10 over VA Tech: Clemson actually does have to win to make the playoffs, so I suspect they will come out strong, put up a big lead early, and I'll go to bed counting this as a win only to wake up the next morning and realize that the Hokies scored 2 garbage TDs in the 4th quarter to cover the spread, but not actually win the game to create the playoff drama that I crave. Whatever, I'm still taking Clemson -10.
Tonyonball through Week 12 (8-12 – Hey, at least it’s not as bad as Cheech!) Week 13 picks:
K-State +4 over TCU: The Big 12 is hot garbage, too bad there are so few games to pick this week. I can root for Snyder, he actually seems to get it.
OU -11 over OKST: OU STILL thinks they may make it to the playoff. If not, at least a nice big Bowl Game for Small Game Bob. Should be an entertaining game, the real bet to make is the over (53)
WV -17 over Baylor: Baylor killed me a few weeks ago. They are terrible. West Virginia doesn’t have a great offense, but they should be able to keep Baylor down enough to win by 3 scores.
Idaho -6 over Georgia State: Idaho won for me last week, let it ride! Go Vandals!
Wisconsin -3 over Penn State: Tonyonball is surprised this game is below 7. Wisconsin has had the tougher schedule, and looked like the overall better team. Penn State is hanging on to the fact that they beat Ohio State in OT. What about that loss to Pitt, bruh? What about getting blown out by Michigan, bruh? Wisconsin is better, and if Clemson falls out, they could get into the playoff. If not, a date at the Rose Bowl awaits.
No picks from Tonyonball’s lady this week. She is busy doing whatever it is she does. Her record last week: 1-4 (leave it to the experts please)
More to come this weekend!
-Tonyonball
