COLLEGE FOOTBALL - WEEK 9
Big day for games today, so as per usual, the article is late and will be kept brief. Just like TOB’s sex life, this article will be quick, painless, and won’t leave a scar (physically anyway, emotionally there will be scars…deep scars…forever). Not to worry, next week TOB will be on assignment at one of the biggest games of the year: Minnesota at Michigan! Did I say biggest, I meant uneventful and bland, either way, Cheech and TOB will be picking against each other live! Our special ladies can’t wait!
TOB just saw the newest Progressive commercial with a “people becoming their dad’s group.” Don’t worry, TOB found the extended cut!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6SAmk_2Odms
Now for the segment that Vegas is trying to get TOB to stop running, Tony and Cheech make picks sure to go wrong!
A few notes before we get to the picks. Way to go IRISH! Beating that Trojan ass like a drum. TOB was at a wedding, but the updates almost couldn’t come fast enough as the Irish piled up touchdown after touchdown. Trap game this week versus NC State, stay strong little leprechauns!
Last weeks’ results:
Cheech (20-13-2) – 4-0-1 last week, killing it Bobby!
Notre Dame (-3.5) over USC - Griff's late night text message pep talks have turned me into a believer again. Go Irish! (Any suggestions on how I can prepare for / cope with the inevitable heartbreak at 11 pm Saturday night would be appreciated) - WIN
Penn State (-9.5) over Michigan - Fun fact: Supposedly the line for this game was 14 points at the beginnig of the year and has since moved to 9.5 even though Michigan has uderperformed, has a hurt QB, and PSU looks like the real deal. Hmmm.... Anyway, the Wolverines are fake. Their D is decent and will keep them in the game, but I don't think they have any shot of winning outright. As I type this, I'm sort of changing my mind about the spread, but I'll go w/ the Nittany Lions. - WIN
-------- another crap week of college football, matchup wise, so it's back to the MAC! -----------
Western Michigan (-3) over Eastern Michigan - This game is in Ypsilanti, but Eastern is 0-2 in conference play and Western is in the thick of the MAC West race. The Broncos have more to play for and should be able to handle the Eagles' West Coast offense. - PUSH
Central Michigan (-2) over Ball State - Nate Davis isn't walking through that door. In another pivotal MAC West matchup, I expect the Chippewas (that's offensive!) to come into Muncie and take care of business against the much maligned Cardinals defense. – BIG WIN
Washington State (-10) over Colorado - This seems like too easy of a pick. WSU is coming off a loss but still has a lot ot play for. They're at home and can put up a ton of points. Colorado sucks...time to head to Bovada.com... - WIN
TOB (12-23): Took a beating last week, and the week before, and the week before…
Wisconsin (-24) over Maryland – TOB’s theory of Wisconsin’s success is widely known. Maryland has fallen off after being giant killers early in the year (oh yeah, it turns out Texas sucks anyway so maybe that victory wasn’t all that impressive). - WIN
OKST (-7.0) over Texas – Remember that time TOB said Texas sucks? Oh yeah, it was one sentence ago. Well, I stand by it. - LOSS
Syracuse (+17.5) over Miami – The new giant killers, the fighting Oranges! After giving deep thought (read: 35 seconds) to the orange being an intimidating fruit, TOB has decided that oranges are indeed scarier than apples and bananas. Tell me something worse than biting down into an orange wedge and chipping a tooth on a seed! At least with apples the seeds are all in the middle, and bananas tend to go bad before you can even eat them. Oranges…a citrus flavored nightmare! - WIN – shout out to Oranges!
Oklahoma (-14.5) over K-State – TOB was fooled into thinking K-State was good this year. Likely due to being friends with Shane Lutchel on The Facebook (I still call it “The” Facebook, suck it Sean Parker). Turns out, they can’t score points or prevent the other team from scoring points. Those skills, as confirmed by Lee Corso, are critical to winning a football game. - LOSS
South Florida (-11.5) over Tulane – USF is back to the cranky coach days, possibly shaking up the Big East. Oh wait, they are in the American Conference now? What the hell is that? Aren’t we all in America? Well, anyway, shout out to TOB’s future cousins-in-law Adam and Alex White. One already goes there, one was recently accepted (also to Tulane, which is an odd coincidence given this game). TOB can’t remember which one is which. - LOSS
Warning: TOB did not go against his gut his week, may be a good week to bet against all of those picks if you’d like to make some quick cash…
This week:
Cheech:
Inidana (-4.5) over Maryland. Hoosiers had good chances to beat Michigan and MSU, which makes me think they're not terrible. Maryland has lost its last 3 games by an average of 30 points, which makes me think they are terrible. Go Hoosiers.
MSU (-2.5) over Northwestern. I think this should be a 7 point spread, but ESPN's matchup predictor has Northwestern as 61.3% likely to win. wtf?
Louisville (-3) over Wake Forest. Sure, why not?
ND (-7) over NC State. This one is scary, but I'll stick w/ the Irish.
Ohio State (-6.5) over Penn State. I have no real opinion on this game, except that it would be a little too straightforward (from an overall CFB / playoff perspective) if PSU wins out. So I bet on the chaos.
TOB:
Florida (+13) over Georgia. This is a rivalry game for God’s sake! Florida sucks, but they should keep it close.
TCU (-7) over Iowa State. Iowa State has been a bit of a giant killer this year. Good for second year head coach Matt Campbell who took over a situation just as bad a Mizzou’s. The difference is, in year two he’s beating Oklahoma in Norman, OK. Mizzou beat Idaho, at home, congratulations.
UCLA (+17.5) over Washington. The Pac-12 is garbage, none of these teams deserve to be favored by more than two touchdowns over any other.
UCF (-43.5) over Austin Peay. Gotta love a 40+ point spread.
Clemson (-14) over Georgia Tech. Clemson off a bye is going to be fired up. Need to win out to stay in the playoff. Good luck Freshman.
An Illinois defensive back was just ejected from the game against Wisconsin. Nice work young man, that’s going to help keep the spread under 30…
Next week, TOB and Cheech break down Notre Dame’s schedule and shamelessly explain why it is the hardest in the country!
It’s Halloween, go have some fun! If you don’t get excited about Halloween, I have bad news for you, you’re a grown up. Don’t be that guy, keep your youthful enthusiasm, just make sure you keep your job…
GO IRISH!
-Tonyonball
